Nothing happened
We're getting reports that absolutely nothing happened at Cafe Arteazen yesterday. Nobody jumped on a waiter's back, nobody set fire to another member of staff and nobody made the V sign at everybody in the cafe before leaving. Neither were nine bags of tea cakes burnt.
However, rumours that both the coffee and food are excellent and the service faster than anywhere else in Langport have been confirmed by the Food Standards Agency to be one hundred percent accurate.
The cleaner outside the cafe yesterday.
