KING & QUEEN SPOTTED IN SOMERTON
In a bid to improve relations with 'the north' new Prime Minister Andy Burnham sent Charles & Camilla to Somerton this week.
It's the first peace-keeping mission with Langport since 1958 when the White Lion lent the Royal Oak a box of pork scratchings.
Talks were held with a number of Somerton 'heavies' and in a Carry On Langport exclusive we can reveal what was agreed.
Let's take a look at the
Halfway House Treaty
Despite online pressure from 3 Cambridge people with second homes in Somerton and who don't even use the pubs on the square, the Langport Arms (home of the town's Royal British Legion branch) will not be asked to remove its union flag from above the main entrance.
Portcullis Players, the highly successful entertainment group here in Langport in the 1990s, will be allowed to regroup at some point in the 2020s provided nobody from Somerton Players is allowed on the committee. "We'd rather all stay friends" said a spokeswoman.
Somerton Church has agreed that if it ever needs its clock repaired it'll get the work guaranteed, rather than bankrupt the town.
and finally retired Somerton shop worker Dirty Gertie from Number 30 [pictured] has signed an agreement to go on both the Proper Job and Overt Locke staff outings this summer.
"I don't mind who services my bicycle pump these days" she told reporters as she stopped for a seater outside the Etsome Arms.
Several other Langport-Somerton agreements were also signed, but then ripped up after councillors couldn't agree on who went to the Red Lion disco first.
That's your Sunday bulletin folks.
Thanks for the contributions and carry on reading!
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Loving Somerton since 2015
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