A selection of bits of conversations overheard around Langport and Huish this week...
"Can you reach it? That's it. You've got it. Now unwrap it and put it through the hole." - Two women up a ladder trying to straighten out Bow Street's wind-battered (but marvellous) flags on Monday.
"How on earth do you justify charging me £95?! I've only been here five minutes and you haven't even looked at my pussy." - an outraged Mayoress of Pitney at Langport Vet's yesterday.
"My father-in-law did a handstand and still got wet." - a frustrated Curry Rivel man annoyed at splashback from the men's urinals at the Rose and Crown.
"What's he talking about?" - half of Langport Town Council listening to one of their new members at a recent meeting.
"Is there an end to this story?" - the other half of Langport Town Council still listening to the same man.
"I fancy a change. What about the old video library at Peony Valley?" - the woman who runs Boilertec speaking to her husband.
"More gin vicar? - oh and how many cucumbers did you manage to get up your cassock when you passed through security?" - a Huish Episcopi Parish Councillor at the 'staff training' at Tesco last Sunday.
"Does that say ten to eleven or twenty-five past nine?" - a tourist trying to tell the time at Langport Town Hall.
"I don't care if you are from Bridgwater - your girlfriend cannot enter the competition." - one of the organisers of the dog show on Cocklemoor yesterday.
"Festival? What festival?" - half the population of Langport.
"I think we've got everything. Shirley Bassey's greatest hits, the Carry On DVDs, the poodle....yes we're reading to go!" - several Langport businessmen off on their holidays to Brokeback Mountain.
"I think we've got everything. Shirley Bassey's greatest hits, the Carry On DVDs, the poodle....yes we're reading to go!" - several Langport businessmen off on their holidays to Brokeback Mountain.
Come home soon you beauties.
