On the big screens this weekend...
Langport Odeon, pictured, has released details of this weekend's showings. Films usually begin just after 'Saturday Surgery', when the last van load of viagra leaves for Portcullis House.
This weekend's features include:
Carry On Matron
Carry on Nurse
Carry On Doctor
and
Carry On Harry
(based on the life and times of Harold Shipman)
As usual - the dispensary will be selling a selection of hot and cold drinks, popcorn and diazepam. Copies of Readers Digest are also available.
The Odeon is assuring customers that there won't be a repeat of last weekend's blunder during a showing of Alfred Hitchcock's 'The Birds'
Viewers were halfway through the 60s classic when suddenly 'Marjorie Nettlebottom - Thrush - Doctor Speke - Room 3' appeared on the screens.
Several people asked for their money back, saying they knew Marjorie's rash had cleared up "years ago"
