Health and Safety row at Langport.
Several local prostitutes (pictured) have complained about the 'leaning walls' at Priest Lane in Langport. The popular knocking shop, between the top road at the church and North Street, has become almost impassable in recent months as the ancient walls either side of it lean so far over that the town council is considering renaming it 'Costa Concordia Walk'.
"It's ridiculous" said Dirty Gerty from number 30, "My last two clients had to tie themselves to me to stop themselves from falling over."
"I agree" said the Mayoress of Pitney, "I was at such a peculiar angle last Saturday, I had to loosen the strap-on and take my pussy to the vet's. My client wanted a refund. Something's got to be done."
Staff at Travis Perkins have agreed to look at the walls but a spokesman said "The town council probably couldn't afford us" as he marked up the price of a broom to £45.99.
Until Priest Lane is made safe, local prostitutes and their clients are urged to use the walls at the front of Langport Prison (above).
