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Carry On Langport's Archives

Tuesday, 6 November 2018

Scabies probe continues at Pitney pub:



Local farmer's armpit 'sealed off until further notice'

Government health officials investigating an infestation at a Pitney pub say they are still refusing to let anyone "undo their top buttons" until at least 4 local farmers have themselves fumigated.

It follows mass panic last Friday night (pictured) when a visiting scientist from Weymouth Aquarium ordered a seafood platter and said she saw "a crab the size of a beer mat" wave at her from a hairy armpit at the bar.


Several men - and at least 3 women from Othery - stripped in a desperate attempt to find the offending invader.

Nobody was allowed to leave until they'd been taken outside and sprayed under the hanging baskets.

"It was marvellous" said drinker Julian Stamp, "I haven't had a decent swill out under there for months"

A pubic inquiry's now underway and the pub's taken crabs off the menu until further notice.


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Sunday morning:

Here are your weekend plans, hangover or no hangover....get down to Huish war memorial Sunday morning and pay your respects as we mark 100 years since the guns fell silent.

No obligation to attend the church service but let's give our war dead a good turn out for the last post etc at the memorial folks. Be there for a quarter to 11.


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