Tunneling equipment, cable cutters, extension leads. All in excellent condition. £50. For more info e-mail Kelways@HinkleyPoint.com
Two used bellclappers. Solid cast iron. (fell out of Huish Church Tower last Sunday - buyer will have to dig them out of Vicarage lawn) £15 for the pair. Contact the Reverend Jess Pitman.
Half a packet of viagra. Full-strength. £8. More info at the clubhouse on Langport Rec.
Out-of-date pork scratchings. Five boxes. £1.50 Bottle of Vimto from 1976. £2.50 - ask at The Rose and Crown.
Large almost new black microwave. £25. (buyer will have to go and get it off the roof of The Halfway House)
8 tickets to Tesco 'staff training parties' on Sunday nights. £20 for the lot. Buy them, discretely, from till number four. The checkout girl will know it's you if you have 3 large cucumbers in your trolley.
CCTV footage showing Langport Town Councillors leaving a staff-party at The Arms absolutely blotto. £30. If interested contact Huish Episcopi Parish Clerk.
CCTV footage showing Huish Episcopi Parish Councillors leaving a staff-party at Eli's totally smashed. £7.50. If interested contact Langport Town Clerk.
Beautiful stretch of 'common land' known as Cocklemoor. £20,000. (Langport Town Council interested but quite rightly says the price is too high) Contact the Environment Agency (which seems to have forgotten the land used to belong to Langport decades ago anyway)
Much-loved Victorian Church Hall - excellently located, essential to village life in Huish Episcopi and built by local tradesmen with public funds. Priceless.
ADMIN ERROR - this has already been sold to Huish Episcopi Academy by a former vicar and is no longer on the market. For more info about how that vicar and the PCC got away with it, e-mail letsbuggerhuishandbuyaclappedoutpubinlangport@outlook.com
Framed portrait of Langport's former Town Clerk. Ask at Hazy-Maes auctioneers in Somerton which says the frame's got to be worth at least a quid.
Framed portrait of Langport's current Town Clerk. Contact his former employer, the Town Council at Seaton, which will give it to you for nothing.
Eli's is selling off a 1976 bottle of Vimto for just £2.50
