A selection of your e-mails and messages from the last four weeks
Dear Carry On Langport,
Walking along Bond's Pool the other day (one of Somerset's narrowest lanes) watching a parent turn up in the QE2 to drop a single child off at the scout hut, my wife and I realised we'd walked in to Huish Episcopi without our passports.
Since then we've been held at the local academy Detention Centre which I must say is marvellous. I had no idea you could get so many cats in to one building. The selection of pronouns is also outstanding.
Many thanks.
Charles Hawtrey.
*****
To the local blog,
Pizzas are fine but does anyone know if we are getting the curry people back anytime soon?
Regards,
The Kumars @ Number 42
*****
Dear Sir,
Once again this town council has f*@!?*** the @!?**! when all they needed to do was pay the @!?££*! and have a bit of forethought, picked up the phone and asked around but no they've @!££***! the f***@£! things again.
Many thanks.
Alf Garnett, The Pontoon Appreciation Society.
*****
To the Blog Bloke,
After several weeks of disruption at Langport Tesco, it's all finally been worth it!
The new layout and wider aisles means even more of us can now bump in to each other and stop and talk for 20 minutes, blocking access for people trying to do their shopping.
Could you pass on our thanks to the designers, workmen and staff.
Best wishes,
From everyone who went to the local primary school.
PS - still can't find the cottage cheese though.
*****
To C.O.L,
Could we pass on our appreciation to the people of Bow Street who have had to deal with some of our clients in recent months.
Since we turned the font in to a urinal, converted the organ in to a smart speaker and the altar in to a tequila bar.....our party house at the former United Reform Church has gone from strength to strength.
However, we are aware that a small number of our guests have escaped in recent weeks, entering local establishments, asking for things local people have never heard of and making a real hash of pronouncing Huish Episcopi.
We are working on the problem and hope to resolve the issue soon.
Many thanks.
Hula Hoop Properties.
*****
To whom it may concern,
As Carry On Langport approaches its 10th birthday, can I complain about some of the rather cheap and smutty innuendo in some of your reports.
In future, I hope that whenever you detect the slightest hint of double entendre in your work that you whip it out immediately.
Many thanks.
Kenneth Williams.
*****
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That's it for now folks!
Thanks for the contributions and carry on reading!
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