A selection of recent correspondence to Carry On Langport:
Editor's Note: abusive or threatening messages will not be tolerated or published.
******
Dear Madame,
Write anything like that about me and my business again and I'll come and knock yer teeth out.
[Name & Address provided]
******
Dear Sir,
Could I take this opportunity to thank the authorities in Langport for leaving the pontoons on the river so late in to the rainy season this year.
Last Saturday afternoon while my family and I were having a picnic on one of them, it broke free from its moorings in the raging torrent and was swept down the river.
It was perfect timing as we had just missed the bus home but the pontoon still got us back to Burnham-on-Sea in time for Doctor Who. We were delighted and will definitely be visiting your town again soon.
What a wonderful service! Do you do return tickets?
Yours faithfully,
Harry and Enid Braithwaite
******
To Whom It May Concern
My family and I are currently thinking about opening a new cafe in Langport as we have heard the town might welcome one.
Would you ask your readers if they could suggest any names for our new business? So far we've come up with 'Another One' or 'Oh Look, Another One' or even 'Fuck Me Sideways! Another One!'
If local people could let us know their thoughts, it would be most appreciated.
Thank you.
[Name & Address provided]
******
Dear Editor,
On behalf of the thousands of people in the area who do not like the cold and wet, I'd like to complain about the use of the word 'Winter' in the description of the illuminations which have just gone up down through the centre of Langport.
While I agree they look wonderful, calling them 'winter festival lights' has caused a great deal of distress in my family.
Why oh why couldn't they have been called something far less offensive like 'Christmas lights' for example?
Many thanks.
Ahmed Ali Amed.
and finally...
Dear Carry On Langport,
While strolling along Cheapside and Bow Street last week and admiring the size of a pendulum in the window at Langport Clocks, my neighbour and I suddenly realised it's been nearly 6 months since we last had any fun up Priest's Lane.
Do you have any idea when the pubic passage will be open again or is it still blocked off?
Many thanks.
'The North Street Gals'
[Names & Addresses provided]
Carry On Langport now has just under 2.2K followers on Facebook, just under 600 on Instagram and around 600 clicks per week [October figures] on its main page...which is what you're reading now!
Many thanks, as always, for the contributions and that's all folks from
Log in again soon!
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